A Change of Heart

Many people have asked me when we decided to adopt.  That is not really an easy answer.  I don't think we have an exact time when we felt that we were definitely supposed to adopt. 

Our journey began probably several years ago.  We already had four children, but we had always wanted at least one more.  Six miscarriages led to no more biological children for us.  A few years ago, both Tim and I felt that we were supposed to pursue adoption or helping kids in some way.  Tim went to an adoption seminar and encouraged me to go to one with him.  So we did.

After long discussions and lots of prayer, we decided to go the foster care route.  We went through lots of training and a home study and after almost a year we were finally certified as foster parents.  There are not a lot of foster kids in our county, and the main goal is to reunite kids with their parents whenever possible.  We received several calls to take kids, but there was always some reason we couldn't.  It just wasn't meant to be.  After a few calls, and feeling awful having to say "no" again, I started to think that we should adopt internationally.  A few more months went by and we received another call.  Again we had to say no.  I think this was the final trigger.  

We talked, prayed, and talked some more before we decided to submit our application to adopt. When we talked to our kids about our change, we were told, "You should have just adopted two years ago.  Then we would have a little brother already."  Yes, we could have done that, but then God couldn't have done the work He needed to.  Two years ago, I may not have been as willing to take a special needs child.  Two years ago, I don't know that I would have considered a child from another country that didn't look like me.  Two years ago, China was not on my top list of places to visit.  Two years ago, I wasn't sure that we would really ever have another child in our family.  A lot can change in two years.  God has made major changes in my heart.  Now, I cannot wait to go to China.  I cannot wait to meet my son who will have a different skin color than me.   Now, I cannot wait to be able to watch him grow and heal in our home.  Most of all, I cannot wait to see what other great things God is going to do in our lives....we just have to listen and be willing to change.